Grayce
“Good luck, Dean Winchester.”
Watching Dean Winchester leave Purgatory is one of the hardest things Castiel has ever done. Not because Dean is leaving, no he was ecstatic about that. Dean needs to leave this miserable, dreary place where monsters wait in the shadows with blood red eyes and sharp claws. It is hard, sad, because Dean does not want to leave Purgatory, not without Cas. Dean screams, yells, and near the end, cries as he is being pulled from Purgatory by some unknown force. Maybe it is Sam who finally figured out how to save his brother. Maybe it divine intervention (Cas has been brought back to life to many times to not believe in his Father).
“Cas!” Dean is pulling against the light that surrounds him. “Grab my hand!” He reaches for Cas, straining so hard Cas is sure Dean is going to break something.
Slowly Cas lifts his hand. He knows if he was meant to go with Dean, to be free of this wretched place, the light would be taking him too.
Cas’s hand reaches right through Dean’s. “Fuck! Cas! Shit, man. Come on! Try harder!” Dean is frantic now. With all the struggling the light that surrounds Dean is loosening its grip. It’s Cas’s turn to panic. Dean Winchester does not deserve to be in this place. Cas does. This is his punishment. It’s his punishment for disobeying, for killing his brothers, for becoming god, for loving. He’s long ago accepted this fact and it no longer bothers him that he will spend an eternity here. But Dean cannot, must not, be in here a moment longer. Dean is too bright and too human to survive this place.
“Dean,” Cas says more calmly than he feels. “You must go.” Cas stands on his toes and with the added inches he’s able to cup Dean’s insubstantial cheek. “Please. Go.” His words hitch at the last syllable. The pain and sadness in Dean’s eyes break Cas’s heart. “Don’t make me loose you to,” Dean’s plea echoes around Cas’s thoughts. “I’m sorry.”
Dean’s face, once on the verge of tears, hardens with Winchester resolve. “I’ll find you!” he shouts. The light is pulling him further up and away. “I’ll get you outta here Cas! Just hold on! I will! Cas… I…” Dean’s words are lost to Cas. The light disappears along with Dean and Cas is left alone.
He doesn’t lower his hand; if he tries he can still pretend her feels Dean’s cheek. Cas’s heart is beating to fast in his chest. Try as he might, Cas can’t stomp out the hope that grows with in him. It warms him, makes him want to live. He will see Dean again. He will be freed from his punishment.
“Good luck, Dean Winchester.”
Kill me. Now.
(via elentori-chan & garama)
